What's A Mom To Do When She Experiences Apathy? (Part 1)

If you have read the last couple of blog posts in my series of “What’s a Mom To Do?” you may have picked up on an underlying theme of a parent in “burn-out.” I’ve shared rather openly my exasperations with a “said” teenager who is probably not acting like a teenager just to make his mother miserable. 

I have done more than my share of grumbling and bellyaching about how hard this is and I have allowed the situation to cast a gray cloud over much of my thinking for far too long. Recently, a close counselor friend of mine gave my “chronic complaint” a name. “Kirby, what you’re dealing with is apathy.” So doc, how serious is my diagnosis?

Let’s unwrap “Apathy” and see if our Creator God has a remedy for what may be troubling folks out there other than just me. If we can understand what apathy is then perhaps we can find freedom from it. I believe we can.

Apathy is defined as a lack of enthusiasm or concern towards something or someone. It is a feeling of indifference. We just don’t care anymore. Obviously this is a problem if this something or someone needs for us to care. Can you think of anything you have grown detached from in recent months? Detached because you don’t want to be disappointed or hurt more than you already have been? Have you lost  hope in the situation ever getting any better? Maybe you suffer from apathy, too.

Apathy comes from the Greek word “pathos” which means passion and “a” which means without. If we’re without our passion for living life (even a part of life) and we have allowed ourselves to become passive about the things God wants us to fight for, then this apathy diagnosis is serious. I can personally affirm that it makes me feel very sick inside. 

Paul Maxwell, in a blog titled, How God Cares for Those Who Don't, wrote this concerning apathy. "Apathy is a powerful non-emotion. It shackles you to yourself. It’s a motivational straight jacket that you can’t  feel or  try your way out of. . . In this way, apathy really is a kind of oppression — emotional, spiritual, and physical oppression.” 

Read back over Maxwell’s words - “it shackles you to yourself. It’s a motivational straight jacket.” That’s where I’m at. Not in all things, but in this one area that I have allowed apathy to creep in and take over. This prolonged stronghold has left me with a self defeating attitude and caused me to forget the powerful God that I serve. I have forgotten that this challenge I face has not taken God by surprise nor is this struggle too big for God to walk me through.    

The more I’m learning about what apathy is, the more I realize that apathy is a place, an attitude in which God does not want us to stay. Nothing good is coming out of us not putting up a fight against this feeling of indifference towards something or someone we've become too worn out to deal with. It is time for us to hit our reset button. 

I have shared before how I wish these blog posts were easier for me to write. Many times, God is teaching me as I am writing. I always hope that what I share helps others, yet I learn so much myself as I write. This is the case today. I would be a hypocrite if I offered you a list of “solutions for your apathy” if I was not allowing the Lord to work out His solutions in my own life. I am ready for God’s work to begin in me.

I WANT to be free from this apathy that has had its hold on me. My son deserves better. Your something or someone in which you have lost all hope also deserves better. GOD IS ABLE. 

For now, let’s start by asking God to give us the “want to” to battle against our lack of motivation.

Lord, I have lost my hope that my situation can get better. Please give me all that I need to continue to care. Make my heart passionate about those things you want me to feel passion about. God, take away my apathy. Amen.

Here is what I will do. This week, I will continue to study and learn all that I can on the solutions to battle our apathy. Next week, I promise to share with you what I have learned and any progress I have made. In the meantime, I will leave you with Ephesians 6:11-12 “We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized.12 We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.”

I am hopeful. I know that God hears our prayers and He is eager to remove our apathy if we are willing to release it to Him. 

I am praying for you, my friend. Will you pray for me as well?